Here’s a useful habit that’s more than a hack…
The next time things are going well, when a project is about to launch, when a meeting has been successful, when the sun is shining… take your phone and go for a walk.
Hit record on an audio app and make a twenty-minute audiobook.
When a non-expert brings a strong point of view to a complex discussion, the words might not mean what they seem to mean.
Surf it up, hit the waves and fall asleep on the sand.
What might be being said is, “I’m worried. I’m afraid. I don’t understand. I am looking for solace.”
Answering emotional word salad with logical insight doesn’t do anything at all for these feelings.
If the argument you’re hearing isn’t based on what we know to be true, and doesn’t lead to a logical conclusion, it could be because it’s not actually seeking to be a productive discussion.
It’s awkward to say “yadda, yadda” but that might be what’s on offer.
When in doubt, look for the emotions and desires behind the words. People often don’t want their arguments to be heard as much as they’re hoping their emotions will be.
